Road Back On Track

For me, the hardest part of having chronic pain is how unpredictable it is. It is like having a constant battle with the pain. One day I am totally fine, the next I might not be. Another part is, that the chronic pain is usually invisible, and someone like me, who have the strong "I can survive alone" attitude, others rarely know how I feel, what I have in my mind etc. I might have days, weeks, or even months when my pain is at a very low level, as minimal as possible. It is always there, but when it reaches a number near 0, I might not even notice it anymore. I have had those times now more than ever before. I am super happy about that. And then, all of sudden, something triggers my pain and it flares. The scary part of any flare-up is, that I never know how long it lasts. It can last just a few hours, or it can last days. Or even weeks, and or a month. And when I get flare, I always end up thinking if I could have done anything differently to avoid it. At that mome...

I am going to reveal a secret from my life! ;) The real reason why I take selfies after (literally) all my workouts, is not only that I am so freaking happy after the workout, and that I want to take selfies... I mean those are part of the reason. But the biggest reason is, that those pics are for me to see my progress. And those pics are there for me to look at if I start to doubt. If I ever start to think something like " What if I cannot get back to Taekwon-Do and hammer throw? " or " why am I even doing this? " Those are the moments when I just open my phone, look those pics, and remember why I started, and why I have not given up after any of my setbacks. Looking those pics also reminds me, that I have been able to get back on track after a long injury, not only once, but twice. The first one was my shoulder injury, surgery and some aftermaths from the surgery. The whole rehabilitation took over 4 years (2012-2016), and at the moment I decided " th...

I have two sports, and I am trying to get back on track in both. I have been writing a lot about hammer throw, but somehow almost nothing about my other sports ITF Taekwon-Do (I will shorten it later as TKD). And the fact, that I have not been writing about it, is a bit weird, as after all, sometimes I feel like Taekwon-Do is the one I want more than hammer throw. My hammer throw coach often tells me, that at some point, I have to make the decision of which one I want to do more. I know his opinion, I know what he thinks about me doing TKD, as it is martial arts and generally speaking involves higher injury risk than hammer throw. Even insurance companies have the "This insurance is not valid in these high-risk sports" , and then there are martial arts. So I understand his point of view, but so far my injuries are all from hammer throw. Which means, that injuries I have (had) has not only affected hammer throw seasons but also my TKD training - often even more affectin...

Those who know me personally, those who follow me on Instagram, and those who spent a couple minutes from their precious free time to read a post I wrote about plastic straws - should be aware, that I have a movement disorder called Essential Tremors. Those who do not know, well now they know. And those who do know, and also for those who do not know, here is a bit more information about my life with that disorder. --> btw, I somehow hate a word disorder. It sounds so serious, or like a contagious. Anyway, Essential Tremors (often shortened as ET) is the most common movement disorders in the whole world. But still, unfortunately, it is also often misdiagnosed or just ignored for years before getting a diagnose. Especially if first symptoms come in childhood. Also, ET is considered a neurodegenerative disease, but the process is usually slow and might take even decades before getting worse. There has also been a lot discussion about the connection between ET and Parkinson...

Have you ever heard someone say, that they do whatever it takes to reach something? That they have the real passion for that thing, and they really are ready to do anything to reach their goal. I mean, anything and everything which are legal. ;) I have made the decision, or more like a promise to myself, that I will do anything and everything it takes to get back to my sports. To try everything to get my lower back in that condition, that I can throw the hammer and do everything in Taekwon-Do without being afraid that one movement can make everything worse, and get me back to level 0. Doing everything I can, so that I will not need to start all over ever again, that I do not need to do all the rehabilitation again, that I just could get injury free training seasons. Those are the things I want. And it does not come only with doing training in a safe way, starting slowly and step by step increasing weights in weightlifting etc. It also includes other areas in life as well,...

Let's face the truth, this straw scandal has reached the point where people are going crazy when even seeing one straw. On the other hand, at the other extreme, there are people who do not care about this whole thing at all and annoys those who care about the environment more than they care for themselves. But let's think this in the face of the disabilities. There has been a lot, I mean a lot, discussions about how plastic straws are not the one and only option. That it is just an excuse, and there is nothing to explain why plastic straws might actually be useful for someone. People who tend to say things like these are not thinking this whole plastic straw thing more deeply. I know how nice it is to think, that with removing all plastic straws the world is saved and a better place to live. And that anyone who is against this ban is a just ignorant person. It is super nice to think, that everything is so simple as that. But it is not. Yes, there are other options for p...

Challenge not only a body but also a mind. Changing the mindset " I cannot ", to " at least I have to try ." Pushing all the possible limits there is, pushing through the pain, deciding that everything is possible, getting back the real motivation and dedication. To me, to the person who was not being able to do almost any training for months due to the chronic back pain, already just participating to fitness challenge was a huge step. Though something similar was in my mind already for a longer time, because I knew that I have to get back to active life. Hammer throw and Taekwon-Do was not in the "allowed sports" list (still not in there), I knew I have to find something else. Something else where I could find similar feeling as from throwing, the feeling of outdoing myself. Feeling the motivation and happiness doing it. So participating to the 8-week challenge felt like a right thing to do. And what would be a better place to start something new t...